Dave’s Daily Quotes

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. ~ Benjamin Franklin

Life’s tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late. ~ Benjamin Franklin

He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money. ~ Benjamin Franklin

You may delay, but time will not. ~ Benjamin Franklin

Books are funny little portable pieces of thought. ~ Susan Sontag

The candidate who tries to solve the country’s problems by blowing his own horn, probably tries to untangle a traffic jam the same way. ~ Anonymous

Blessed are the hard-of-hearing for they shall miss much idle gossip. ~ Anonymous

The happiness of any society begins with the well being of the families that live in it. ~ Kofi Annan

I’d say that I think the most revolutionary act that you can commit in our society today is to be happy. ~ Patch Adams

The happiest heart that ever beat Was in some quiet breast That found the common daylight sweet, And left to Heaven the rest. ~ John V. Cheney

Give not over thy mind to heaviness:  the joyfulness of a man prolongeth his days. ~ Ecclisiasticus (?) Translation:  Laugh and you’ll live longer…

No matter what happens… somebody will find a way to take it too seriously. ~ Anonymous

I’m not a smart man, but I know what love is. ~ Forrest Gump

There’s a blush for won t, and a blush for shan’t, and a blush for having done it: There’s a blush for thought and a blush for naught, and a blush for just begun it. ~ John Keats

The rate at which a person can mature is directly proportional to the embarrassment he can tolerate. ~ Douglas Engelbart

Life is eternal, and love is immortal, and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight. ~ Rossiter Worthington Raymond

A human life is a story told by God. ~ Hans Christian Andersen

Most women don’t know where to look when they’re eating a banana. ~ Anonymous

The Senate was holding hearings on deceptive sweepstakes practices. These companies target the elderly, making them think they’re going to get a bunch of money, when in reality they never see any of it. The most popular of these scams is called Social Security. – Colin Quinn    ++

Organizers of National Orgasm Week were disappointed to learn that the majority of women surveyed just pretended to celebrate. ~ Anonymous

Take it from me, wrinkle cream doesn’t work. I’ve been using it for two years and my balls still look like raisins.  ~  Harland Williams

Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock. ~ Anonymous

Dreaming frees the soul, energizes the spirit and allows you to do things that would get your ass thrown in jail if you really tried them. ~ Anonymous

There is only one success—to be able to spend your life in your own way. ~ Anonymous

When you are wrestling for possession of a sword, the man with the handle always wins. ~ Anonymous