Dave's Daily Quotes

Dave’s Daily Quotes

  • Stable relationships are for horses.  

  • I am a deeply superficial person.  

  • Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television.  

  • If your beauty is on the inside, turn yourself inside out.  

  • Wife was feeling romantic and told me to whisper her favorite words.  I said, “I’ll buy it for you.”  

  • My child was Trustee of the Month at Folsom!!  

  • Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.  

  • What is 8 divided in two parts? Vertically it is 3; horizontally it is 0    

  • In theory, the difference between theory and practice is small. In practice, the difference between theory and practice is large. ~ William Edwards Deming  

  • Most husbands become interested in politics. In fact, many of them are already the minority leader in their house.  

  • The most difficult arithmetic to master is the art of counting our blessings.  

  • The dollar has dropped in value–but there’s no need to worry until some country turns down our foreign aid.  

  • The older generation thought nothing of getting up at 5am. The younger generation doesn’t think much of it either.  

  • Sometimes I feel like I’m only ankle deep in the gene pool.  

  • Can a first cousin, once removed, return?  

  • Cemetery (n):  A marble orchard not to be taken for granite.  

  • Did you expect mere proof to sway my opinion?  

  • The truth is out there?  Anyone know the URL?

  • Theory of relativity: If you go back far enough, we’re all related.  

  • When your mind goes blank, don’t forget to turn off the sound.  

  • When you have the Energy and the Money, you haven’t got the Time! When you have the Energy and the Time, you haven’t got the Money! When you have the Money and the Time, you haven’t got the Energy!  

  • Ulcers are something you get from mountain climbing over molehills. ~ Anonymous

  • We have stopped being fishers of men and we are now the keepers of the aquarium. ~ (variously attributed)  

  • Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time. ~ Haruki Murakami  

  • Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things. ~ Peter Drucker  

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