Dave's Daily Quotes

Dave’s Daily Quotes

  • I like angles, but only to a degree.  

  • They think, therefore I am. ~ God  

  • I saw the light. I turned it off.  

  • A diagnostic is someone who doesn’t know whether there are two gods.  

  • The word stifle is an anagram of itself.  

  • Think ‘HONK’ if you’re Telepathic.  

  • Down with gravity!  

  • If you friend request me on Facebook and your profile picture is a car, I will assume you’re a transformer.  

  • If PLAN A doesn’t work, stay cool.  The alphabet has 25 more letters.

  • Be yourself. No one can ever tell you you’re doing it wrong.  

  • Buy the beer first, this job ain’t gonna be easy.  

  • The joyfulness of a man prolongeth his days. ~ New Testament Translation: Laugh and you’ll live longer…  

  • God gave the Angels wings and humans chocolate. ~ Debbie Macomber  

  • You should never wear your best trousers when you go out to fight for freedom and liberty. ~ Henrik Ibsen  

  • An optimist is a person who, when he sees the handwriting on the wall, claims it’s a forgery.  

  • What part of THOU SHALT NOT don’t you understand?  

  • You have to wonder about humans, they think God is dead and Elvis is alive! ~ Anonymous  

  • Five Balls (Extract from “Suzanne’s Diary to Nicholas” by James Patterson)

    Imagine life as a game in which you are juggling some five balls in the air. You name them – Work – Family – Health – Friends – Spirit, and you’re keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce…

  • The tongue must be heavy indeed, because so few people can hold it. ~ Anonymous  

  • No human beings were around during the Ice Age because it was the pre-stork era. ~ Richard Lederer  

  • I know that this defies the law of gravity, but, you see, I never studied law. ~ Bugs Bunny  

  • I have to speak what is in my mind; what is in my mind is more interesting than what’s going on outside of it. ~ Anonymous  

  • Those who never quote, in return are never quoted. ~ Issac D’Israeli  

  • The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you’re signing somebody’s cast. ~ Demetri Martin  

  • You have decided being scared is caused mostly by thinking. ~ David Foster Wallace

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