Dave’s Daily Quotes

Why love if losing hurts so much? We love to know that we are not alone. ~ Clive Staples Lewis

Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip. ~ Gary Allan

Who are you to question why your god doesn’t want me to believe in him?

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

The invisible and the non-existent often look very much alike.

Everyone tells me I’m a prefectionist.

What if this isn’t a rhetorical question?

If there were no rhetorical questions, what would we do with our hypothetical answers?

I think my brain has a mind of its own.

I am one of the greatest liars in the English language–I wouldn’t be telling you this if I didn’t know it wasn’t true.

Circular Definition:  see Circular Definition

Call me and ask about my vow of silence.

By God, for a moment there it all made sense…

It’s all fun and games till somebody loses an eye. Then it’s fun and games you can’t see.

That which does not kill me may wish to hell it had….

If life gives you lemons juggle them.

The way to a man’s heart is to saw his sternum open.

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody is looking. ~ H. L. Mencken

It’s not the pace of life that concerns me; it’s the sudden stop at the end.

If it were truly the thought that counted, more women would be pregnant.

If I’m ignorant, that’s the first I’ve heard of it!

If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?

I before E except after C. We live in a weird society!

Cooking tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out.  ~ Nicole Hollander

I read this article. It said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, smoking too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? This is my idea of a great day!  ~ Monica Piper