A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 ++<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
If you don’t pay your exorcist you get repossessed.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
What’s the definition of a will? It’s a dead giveaway.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Every calendar’s days are numbered.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
When the electricity went off during a storm at a school the students were de-lighted.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
I used to be a tap dancer until I fell in the sink.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
He wears glasses during math because it improves division.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
She was only a whiskey maker but he loved her still.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It wasn’t school John disliked it was just the principal of it.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It’s better to love a short girl than not a tall.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn’t control his pupils.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
The one who invented the door knocker got a No-bell prize.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Old power plant workers never die they just de-generate.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
There was a ghost at the hotel, so they called for an inn specter.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at<\/p>\n
large.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 ++<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Some Spanish government employees are Seville servants.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was<\/p>\n
a salted.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
When cannibals ate a missionary they got a taste of religion.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 ++<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she’d dye.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer the agony of defeat.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Driving on so many turnpikes was taking its toll.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
To some, marriage is a word. \u00a0To others, a sentence.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Old lawyers never die; they just lose their appeal.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
In democracy it’s your vote that counts. In feudalism it’s your count that votes.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 ++ If you don’t pay your exorcist you get repossessed. What’s the definition of a will? It’s a dead giveaway. Every calendar’s days are numbered. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis. When the electricity went off during […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16019"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16019"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16019\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16020,"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16019\/revisions\/16020"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16019"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16019"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/davesdailyquotes.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16019"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}