Category Frustration

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The mistakes made by Congress wouldn’t be so bad if the next Congress didn’t keep trying to correct them. ~ Cullen Hightower

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It is later than we think–and some of us are not thinking!

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First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down. ~ George Burns

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I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out. ~ Jay London

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The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were wrong. ~ David Letterman

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Don’t worry about your heart, it will last you as long as you live. ~ W. C. Fields

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When turkeys mate they think of swans. ~ Johnny Carson

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I am as frustrated with society as a pyromaniac in a petrified forest. ~ A. Whitney Brown

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Don’t worry too much about what people think, because they seldom do.

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The law of heredity is that all undesirable traits come from the other parent.

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My next house will have no kitchen, only vending machines.

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To those who think that the law of gravity interferes with their freedom, there is nothing to say. ~ Lionel Tiger

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When I buy pistachio nuts, I never waste my time prying open those nuts which are completely closed. It’s more productive to spend my time with those that are partially open and willing to be opened further. And so it is with people’s minds. ~ Michael Zarlenga

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You worry too much about your job. Stop it. You are not paid enough to worry.

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It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can stop him from lynching me, and I think that’s pretty important. ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

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Reducing an issue to black and white clears the way for violence.  ~ Anonymous

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We have no right to ask when a sorrow comes, ‘Why did this happen to me?’ unless we ask the same question for every joy that comes our way. ~ Phillip E. Bernstein

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There are days when it takes all you’ve got just to keep up with the losers.~ Robert Orben

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It is better to sleep on what you intend doing than to stay awake over what you’ve done.

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I fear vastly more a futile, incompetent old age than I do any form of death.  ~ William Allen White

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My mind is elsewhere today. Wish I was with it.

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Real Men don’t get defensive when they learn that not everybody shares their enthusiasm for Apple products.

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One of the most time-consuming things is to have an enemy. ~ E. B. White

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Trouble is the common denominator of living. It is the great equalizer. ~ Soren Kierkegaard

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The hardest part about being a kid is knowing you have got your whole life ahead of you. ~ Jane Wagner

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Some go on a diet while most are merely wishful shrinkers. ~ Evan Esar

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The right half of the brain controls the left half of the body. This means that only left handed people are in their right mind. ~ Anonymous

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A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy? ~ Albert Einstein

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If it’s not one thing, it’s your mother.

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Being Politically Correct means always having to say you’re sorry.

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The trouble with living alone is that it’s always your turn to do the dishes.

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I always thought a yard was three feet, then I started mowing the lawn.  ~ C.E. Cowman

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If a situation requires undivided attention, it will occur simultaneously with a compelling distraction.

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Among economists, the real world is often a special case.

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When Government bureaucratic remedies do not match your problem, you modify the problem, not the remedy.

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After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself.

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Politicians who dislike the restraints of highly organized economic research like to remark that a truly great research worker needs only three pieces of equipment–a pencil, a piece of paper, and a brain. But they quote this maxim more often at political banquets than at budget hearings.

Murphology

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Murphy’s Law: If anything can go wrong, it will. Corollary: It can. The Extended Murphy’s Law: If a series of events can go wrong, it will do so in the worst possible sequence. Silberman’s Paradox: If Murphy’s Law can go wrong, it will. Gattuso’s Extension of Murphy’s Law: Nothing is ever so bad that it […]

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The good Lord gave you a body that can stand most anything. It’s your mind you have to convince. ~ Vincent Lombardi

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We see things as we are, not as they are.

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Nothing is so hard for those who abound in riches as to conceive how others can be in want. ~ Jonathan Swift

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The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence. ~ Lyman Bryson

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Too many people are ready to carry the stool when the piano needs to be moved.

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Every time history repeats itself the price goes up.

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A man is known by the company he owns.

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The higher a monkey climbs, the more you can see of its behind. ~ Joe Stilwell

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My wife is too clever to understand anything she does not like.

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It’s not what you know that counts…it’s what you think of in time. ~ Les Aikman

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When you win, you’re an old pro; when you lose, you’re an old man.

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Christmas is the time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell government what they want and their kids pay for it. ~ Richard Lamm