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At the age of twelve, I began hustling newspapers like many other great Americans had done. The only difference was that they became great.

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When I buy pistachio nuts, I never waste my time prying open those nuts which are completely closed. It’s more productive to spend my time with those that are partially open and willing to be opened further. And so it is with people’s minds. ~ Michael Zarlenga

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O Lord, grant that we may always be right, for Thou knowest we will never change our minds. ~ Anonymous

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My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I’m happy. I can’t figure it out. What am I doing right? ~ Charles M. Schulz

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It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can stop him from lynching me, and I think that’s pretty important. ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

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Correction does much, but encouragement does more. ~ Goethe

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Reducing an issue to black and white clears the way for violence.  ~ Anonymous

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We have no right to ask when a sorrow comes, ‘Why did this happen to me?’ unless we ask the same question for every joy that comes our way. ~ Phillip E. Bernstein

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It is never easy being a mother.  If it were easy, fathers would do it.

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Age is to women like Kryptonite is to Superman. ~ Kathy Lette

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Trouble is the common denominator of living. It is the great equalizer. ~ Soren Kierkegaard

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The hardest part about being a kid is knowing you have got your whole life ahead of you. ~ Jane Wagner

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I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.

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The more things change, the more they stay insane.

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The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life. ~ George Carlin

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A girl’s legs are her best friends…but even the best of friends must part. ~ Redd Foxx

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I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. ~ Joan Rivers

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I like Florida. Everything is in the 80′s. The temperatures, the ages and the IQ’s. ~ George Carlin

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Being Politically Correct means always having to say you’re sorry.

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Our visions of what is better are always informed by our perception of what is bad about our present situation. ~ Lugones & Spelman

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I dreamed of wind, a wind there came And through the branches blew.  I dreamed of leaves, of leave of gold, And leaves of gold there grew.  J. R. R. Tolkien

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Thanks to television, for the first time the young are seeing history made before it is censored by their elders. ~ Margaret Mead

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Life is like photography. You use the negative to develop.

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The second most powerful phrase in the world is “Watch this!” The most powerful phrase is “Oh yeah? Watch this!”

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If a situation requires undivided attention, it will occur simultaneously with a compelling distraction.

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Among economists, the real world is often a special case.

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After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself.

Drazen’s Law of Restitution

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The time it takes to rectify a situation is inversely proportional to the time it took to do the damage. Example 1: It takes longer to glue a vase together than to break one. Example 2: It takes longer to lose X number of pounds than to gain X number of pounds.

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Don’t be yourself; be someone a little nicer. ~ Mignon McLaughlin

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A chicken doesn’t stop scratching just because worms are scarce.

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The good Lord gave you a body that can stand most anything. It’s your mind you have to convince. ~ Vincent Lombardi

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We see things as we are, not as they are.

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The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence. ~ Lyman Bryson

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The nice thing about standards is there are so many to choose from.

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Every time history repeats itself the price goes up.

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The higher a monkey climbs, the more you can see of its behind. ~ Joe Stilwell

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My wife is too clever to understand anything she does not like.

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Never defend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor. ~ Ogden Nash

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Free people are not equal, and equal people are not free.  ~ Lawrence Reed  http://www.mackinac.org/3832

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Terrorists can attack our freedom, but only Congress can destroy it.

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The right to offend is far more important than the right not to be offended. ~ Rowan Atkinson

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Tears have a wisdom all their own. They come when a person has relaxed enough to let go and to work through his sorrow. They are the natural bleeding of an emotional wound, carrying the poison out of the system. Here lies the road to recovery. ~ F. Alexander Magoun

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Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane. ~ Philip K. Dick

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Everyone who hates speeding tickets, raise your right foot.

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I’d rather regret the things I’ve done than regret the things I haven’t done.  ~ Lucille Ball

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If life gives you LEMONS, just rearrange the letters and you have MELONS

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The day that you die will be like any other day… only shorter. ~ Samuel Beckett

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All men are born equal, but quite a few eventually get over it. ~ Lord Mancroft

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The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs. You can no more blame circumstances for your character than the mirror for your appearance.

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Just when we learn to take things with a grain of salt, the doctor puts us on a salt-free diet.