Month: June 2014
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Cooking tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. ~ Nicole Hollander
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I read this article. It said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, smoking too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? This is my idea of a great day! ~ Monica Piper
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No one can tell what goes on in between the person you were and the person you become. No one can chart that blue and lonely section of hell. There are no maps of the change. You just… come out the other side. Or you don’t. ~ Stephen King
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Money is the root of all wealth.
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No man knows his true character until he has run out of gas, purchased something on the installment plan, and raised an adolescent. ~ Marcelene Cox
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One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.
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Life is like soccer… you need goals!
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There is no “I” in slut…..but there is a “U.”
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I’m going to go and find myself. If I’m back before I return, keep me here until I come home!
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It’s funny how you think I’m listening….
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I prefer to describe myself as a ‘contemporary anthropological interactive observer’ because “stalker” sounds bad.
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You can better lose a lover than love a loser.
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Friends are like condoms, they protect you through hard times.
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Passwords are like underwear: change them often.
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I’m knot dumb!
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There needs to be a thorough examination, by Muslims everywhere, of why it is that the faith they love breeds so many violent mutant strains. ~ Salman Rushdie, Washington Post, Sept 2001
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30 Ways To Deal With Stress
1. Jam miniature marshmallows up your nose and sneeze them out. See how many you can do at a time. 2. Use your MasterCard to pay your Visa and vice-versa. 3. Pop some popcorn without putting the lid on. 4. When someone says “have a nice day”, tell them you have other…
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The world is round; it has no point. ~ Adrienne Gusoff
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If you live your life with your head up your a**, you’ll always experience the same old s**t.
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Girls just want to have funds. ~ Adrienne Gusoff
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Any book worth banning is a book worth reading.
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What’s wrong with telling a lawyer joke? Lawyers don’t think they’re funny and no one else thinks they’re jokes.
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Always specify that your drive-through order is to go.
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Take life with a grain of salt… a slice of lime, and a shot of tequila.
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The watermelons in my garden are so big it wouldn’t take many to make a dozen.