Month: December 2012
-
Birthdays are like busses, never the number you want.
-
When I have a birthday I take the day off. But when my wife has a birthday, she takes a year or two off.
-
Do you have trouble making up your mind? Well, yes or no?
-
Radioactive halibut will make fission chips.
-
The directive in life, the moral imperative was so uncomplicated. It could be expressed in single words, not complete sentences. It sounded like this: Look. Listen. Choose. Act. ~ Barbara Hall
-
When I’m not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
-
I wish I had a dime for every dime I’ve had.
-
Smile is the way to solve many problems. Silence is the way to avoid many problems.
-
Excellence is not a skill. It is an attitude. ~ Ralph Marston
-
A marriage anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. ~ Paul Sweeney
-
The world has grown suspicious of anything that looks like a happily married life. ~ Oscar Wilde
-
Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. ~ Robert Frost
-
He’s the world’s greatest proof of reincarnation–no one could get that dumb in just one lifetime.
-
I have an intense desire to return to the womb. Anybody’s. ~ Woody Allen
-
I’m not the man I used to be, so why should I have to pay his debts? ~ Gary Apple
-
Courtship, n.: that period during which the girl decides whether or not she can do better.
-
Schizophrenia may be a necessary consequence of literacy. ~ Marshall Mcluhan
-
Jokes are grievances. ~ Marshall Mcluhan
-
For tribal man space was the uncontrollable mystery. For technological man it is time that occupies the same role. ~ Marshall Mcluhan
-
Whether it’s the best of times or the worst of times, it’s the only time we’ve got. ~ Art Buchwald
-
The conservative who resists change is as valuable as the radical [liberal] who proposes it. ~ Ariel Durant
-
It may be true that you can’t fool all the people all the time, but you can fool enough of them to rule a large country. ~ Will Durant
-
When liberty destroys order the hunger for order will destroy liberty. ~ Will Durant
-
I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead. ~ Garry Shandling
-
The political machine triumphs because it is a united minority acting against a divided majority. ~ Will Durant