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Day November 29, 2010

Rather to excite your judgment briefly than to inform it tediously. ~ Francis Bacon

A man’s best friend is his dog, and his worst enemy, his dogma.

Ninety-nine per cent of the people in the world are fools and the rest of us are in great danger of contagion. ~ Thornton Wilder     ++

When he said we were trying to make a fool of him, I could only murmur that the Creator had beat us to it. ~ Ilka Chase

Fishing seems to be divided, like sex, into three unequal parts:  anticipation and recollection and, in between, actual performance. ~ Arnold Gingrich

The best way to make a fire with two sticks is to be sure that one of them is a match.

I am grateful that I am not as judgmental as all those censorious, self-righteous people around me.  ++

Some people have six-pack abs; I have a keg. ~ Craig Sharf

I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. ~ Galileo Galilei

Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever. ~  Napoleon Bonaparte

An amnesiac comes into a bar. He asks, “Do I come here often?”    ++

Male or Female, Everything has a Gender

Apples are Female–the best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don’t want to reach for them as they’re afraid of falling and getting hurt. Wine is Male–it begins as a grape, and it’s up to women to stomp the crap out of it until it turns into something acceptable to have […]

I’d like to have more self-esteem, but I don’t deserve it.  ++

I was only looking at your name-tag, honest!  ++

Strip mining prevents forest fires.  ++

Heck is where people go who don’t believe in Gosh.    ++

Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.

There are two primary choices in life:  to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.  ~ Denis Waitley   ++

He who is being carried does not realize how far the town is. ~ African Proverb

I just hate cocaine but love the way it smells. ~ Anonymous

Money isn’t the most important thing in life, but it’s reasonably close to oxygen on the “gotta have it” scale. ~ Zig Ziglar

Little men with little minds and little imaginations go through life in little ruts, smugly resisting all changes which would jar their little worlds. ~ Zig Ziglar